When you do not ask, the answer is already 'No'

John 16:24 “Until now you have asked nothing in my name. Ask, and you will receive, that your joy may be full.”

Many times people go through life operating with a victim mentality. Thinking that everyone and everything is against them. Such a worldview makes a person think they are a victim of circumstances and that they do not have any control over what goes on in their life.

Something I have come to realise is that often people don’t achieve what they need to, access what they need to, making the progress they need to, accomplish tasks quickly or get to know what they need to etc. just  because of not asking. This failure to ask can be premised on negative self-talk such as ‘No one would be willing to help me’ or ‘I don’t deserve to be helped.’ Apart from this negative self-talk, one other thing which tends to make people not ask is because of pride.

Merriam-Webster defines pride as ‘a feeling that you respect yourself and deserve to be respected by other people; a feeling that you are more important or better than other people and  a feeling of happiness that you get when you or someone you know does something good, difficult, etc.” I draw your attention to the second definition which points to the thinking that one is more important or better than other people. Having this mentality makes one unwilling to admit they could actually get anything of value from others, whom they deem less important.

Whether you are caught in self-doubt (low self esteem) or pride (inflated self esteem), when you don’t ask- the answer is already NO. In my own life I have embraced this philosophy and I have seen many doors open which had I not asked (knocked, enquired, availed myself etc) would never have opened. There are relationships and networks which have been forged which would not have come about had I not asked. I have tapped into certain business opportunities just because of taking the step of asking.

Approaching life with that world view that the worst thing which could happen in me ‘asking’ is that I will get a No frees you up from fear of failure. For all you know where you could have been operating with a binary approach i.e. either Yes or No...you have been overlooking another option- Maybe. In as much you might not get a Yes at the time of asking (i.e. you might not get the info you need, assistance required, connection you need), there could be scope of getting the Yes later on. But you will never get to know this unless you ask J.

This principle applies to all aspects of your life; relationships, work/career, business, finances etc. You will never know if you can get a raise if you don’t ask, you won’t know if you can access that opportunity if you don’t ask, you will not know which investment options to pursue or let go of if you don’t ask etc. Same as with your life in those areas, so too does this apply when it comes to praying. When you ask, you must believe and not doubt. If you doubt then you might as well not expect to receive anything.

James 1: ⁵If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. ⁶But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. ⁷That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. ⁸Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do.

Matthew 7:7 "Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.

John 14:13-14 "Whatever you ask in My name, that will I do, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son.”

Philippians 4:6 Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.